A selective call bell system..for example,when the call bell rings, they have an automated choice....
Enter 1 if you are calling to say you have to crap AGAIN.
Enter 2 if you are calling to say you have already s**t (this a totally different problem).
Enter 3 if you are a drug seeking a$hole and are requesting morphine.
Enter 4 if your crazy family is here and they want to speak with me.
Enter 5 if you feel like complaining and think I give a damn.
Enter 6 if you dropped your tissue box again and think I am coming in anytime soon to pick it up.
Enter 7 if you think I am a damn waitress and will get you the meal you actually ordered.
Enter 8 if your IV is beeping again because you just can't seem to remember to keep your ******* arm straight no matter how many times we tell you.
Enter 9 if you think Nurses walk on water, you haven't called since you have come in, you hate to bother me, your family is normal, you ARE having crushing chest pain and think you are going to die....I'll be right there.
Do not hit 9 when you meant to hit 2. You will wish you did die!
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If only we really had this!
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